You desperately seek patience
but it quickly flee
It was still there
so close
Where is it?
I need it so much
Now come on
Now stay there
That's so annoying again
you can hardly believe
How can you overcome that
When patience just disappears
Well then get some coffee
and the chocolate
That will help
to find what disappeared so quickly
si_irini
Marissa and my MiL and I went to "Patience" today at the Gilbert and Sullivan Very Light Opera Company. I had forgotten how very pointy this one is; among the targets are:
* dukes
* poets
* the aesthetic movement
* moralizing poetry
* weird poetic pronunciations
* true love
* the British army's self-image
* men dressing in ways that impress other men, and assuming it's attractive to women !! (this might be a modern gloss but it's kind of explicitly there in the plot too)
* women getting old (I think I side with Sullivan on this, what the hell was Gilbert's hang-up)
It gives me great joy to imagine W.S. sitting down and saying "today I have to write some bad poetry" and probably having to throw out the first couple versions as not bad enough.
Certaines sont timides et prennent plus de temps 
mais voilà qu'elles se réveillent et offrent de l'or aux coeurs qui savent les attendre 
#spring #flowers #natureincity #blossom #photo #photography #patience
Time Reveals All Things, Lucius Annaeus Seneca c. 4 B.C.E.–65 C.E.
#LuciusAnnaeusSeneca, #Motivation, #Patience, #Perspective, #Philosophy, #SelfImprovement
Vintage ◦ Classic ◦ Historical | Art ◦ Design ◦ Inspiration | Restored ◦ Enhanced ◦ Remixed
Prints, T-Shirts, Stickers, & More by @rocketshipretro via RedBubble → https://bigplanetprints.com/go/tqHOVi
In a weeks time my 2nd album is released.
If you have been on @musicians.today since the beginning you may have been part of the ill-fated #NodToSam music collab started by @cambraca
Sadly that never went anywhere and fizzled out.
However, the guitar/vocal parts I did submit for my little cohort group, I sat on for a year and did nothing with until about 6 months ago when I dug out the Reaper session and worked it up into a full song that is the last track on the new album "Goodbye" #patience
A quotation from Bill Watterson
CALVIN: The only skills I have the patience to learn are those that have no real application in life.
Bill Watterson (b. 1958) American cartoonist
Calvin and Hobbes (1993-07-03)
Sourcing, notes: wist.info/watterson-bill/4101/
73 days smoke free!!! Just had to share because I haven’t checked this app for a little bit and I was blown away by how far I have come 
. I would say half of the days are easy and half are really difficult and I still use nicotine mints and gum the amount depends on the day but on the whole it’s getting less. I am still shocked that I’m managing to stick with this and I’m truly proud of myself. Also I’m loving that I can say I haven’t smoked this year 
and as the days are ticking along being able to say this means more.
Stopping smoking is just one of many things that I’m either already doing or intending to do and every goal is something to make my body or mind healthier and stronger. I know that these objectives are contributing to me getting to become the person I want to be. Every piece of the puzzle matters and in the short term will help to get me through intensive trauma therapy and in the long term who knows, it’s actually not something I’ve thought about yet. I’m naturally an impatient person so that is also something I’m working hard on by trusting the choices I’m making and having faith in the path I’m walking and that at the very least my mental health will improve so that I can be a stronger more independent woman.
I want to thank everyone that has been following me on my journey to stronger mental health and huge thank you for you love, beautiful messages and support. #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthrecovery #ptsd #ptsdrecoveryjourney #complextrauma #complextraumarecovery #trusttheprocess #positivity #strength #love #betterhealth #patience #healthybodyhealthymind #journey #stopsmoking #stopsmokingstartliving
I have a special needs person who’s an acolyte at the first service. She does things fine, but getting her to do things differently or in a new way is a challenge, so I tend to let a lot slide.
Today we had a small issue with the wine cruet, and in trying to get it turned around, I set it down on the altar and it urped up wine onto the fair linen. And now I need to apologize to the Altar Guild for making a mess.
#Episcopal #Oops #PriestLife #Patience
A Senseless Breakup As a Zen Koan
She put me in an impossible situation, and gave me the gift of a koan.
Photo by Takeshi Yu on UnsplashI’m still reeling from the worst breakup of my life. Well, the worst breakup so far. There’s no telling if something even worse will come some day. It’s been almost two years, but last night a song came up and I cried anew. Sometimes, it is like it happened yesterday.
I don’t go into relationships reservedly. This is true with everyone. My current boyfriend. My ex-wife. And the girl who is the topic of this piece. So, without reservations, I gave her everything I could give her. Most of all, I gave her my ability to listen, and my patience. How were my ability to listen and my patience useful?
She engaged in self-harm. The scars were plainly visible during our first date. She answered truthfully when I asked about them.
She abused substances. She was truthful about this, too.
She did not follow her medication regimen. She told me so, truthfully.
She flat out told me, months before our breakup, that she did not see a future for us. This was her truth.
I listened patiently to all of this, without flying off the handle. I don’t know what anger would have given me, beyond an immediate and short-lived feeling of satisfaction. If anything, it would most likely have ruined our relationship sooner. It actually almost did. One day, we had an argument in which she denied the existence of racism. I could not tolerate this, and so I flew off the handle.
She saw me as her abusive mother, and I triggered her cPTSD. I did not physically harm her – I would never have done this – but my yelling was enough. She ran out of my apartment to cool down. I was so horrified at my reaction that I decided to break up with her. She came back saying that if we worked on our relationship, we could make things work. I accepted her offer and we came back together.
Her denial of racism punched me in the gut. I’m the type of enby who will readily cry if he sees black parents on the news talk about the senseless assassination of their child by cops. I live in a majority black neighborhood. Heck, my boyfriend is black. Denying obvious racism is an excellent way to get me to explode. I’m not proud of this, but it was the truth (and maybe still is the truth). This is the only time I displayed anger with her.
The life I had lived with my ex-wife prior to our divorce was extremely peaceful… and I daresay now too peaceful for growth. The partners I’ve had after my divorce have taught me so much. I am already enlightened. Anger is not generally a useful emotion. Anger is a choice that I am making. Etc. If the girl I’m talking about denied racism today, I’d hope that I wouldn’t fly off the handle. Still, I’m not sure that even today, I’d be able to handle it peacefully. It is such a gut punch.
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Join Us Bonfire MerchOkay. So, I said that she gave me the gift of a koan. What is a koan? It is a device that Zen practitioners use. Some koans are textual. Here is an example of a textual koan:
What is the sound of one hand clapping?
In order to answer the question, a Zen student encountering this koan will typically try to think their way through it, and will fail miserably. It is possible to answer this koan, but not through discursive stratagems. There are many such textual koans in the Zen tradition. There is, however, another type of koan. I don’t think I’m being original here, but I’m going to call this a life koan. It is a situation that grips you deeply in your gut. It is unsatisfactory, and maybe unresolvable.
When this girl broke up with me, she did put me into an impossible situation. When our relationship was firing on all cylinders, it was pure magic. I had adored her, and given her everything I could give, and yet… this was not enough.
Why?
Oh, I can list dozens of reasons, but these reasons are all bullshit. She did give me reasons, but a few weeks after our breakup she revealed to me, from her own mouth, that her reasons were lies. How far had we fallen from her initial truthfulness?
Thus, it is, that almost two years after our breakup. I wrestle with this koan: why did she leave me? I don’t think this question has a satisfactory answer. This koan is a parting gift that she gave me, inadvertently. Still, it is a gift, and one that I will most likely animate my Zen practice to my death.
Used to live next door to a family where the lady of the house and her two sons had Crohns. It was quite limiting for them at times. I hope it calms down shortly for your twins. 
The relentless assault of bad news... overwhelming.
My twins dealing with their Crohn's flare ups... overwhelming.
I just got the professional photos of #LaffysBigTownhouseRenovation... finally. Might be a good time to post them.
There are so many. I'll post befores/afters, but it'll be a lot and take awhile. And I doubt I can alt text each one. I may need your help there.
It'll be one long thread under the above hashtag. I'll number the posts.
A quotation from Ambrose Bierce
PATIENCE, n. A minor form of despair, disguised as a virtue.
Ambrose Bierce (1842-1914?) American writer and journalist
“Patience,” The Devil’s Dictionary (1911)
Sourcing, notes: wist.info/bierce-ambrose/74496…
I swear to God, getting my cars #SMOGchecked in #LosAngrles is increasingly more & more arduous & painful every year.
It's more than a test of the emissions of my car: It's a personal test - the final boss fight - of one's #stamina, #patience & #tolerance.
#randomthoughts
- #gaming - trying to play #starcitizen is how you learn #patience and #understanding.
- #elitedangerous is an adequate substitute, but after 3k+ hours, its hard to be engrossed anymore.
- #sundayscaries obsoleted by last week's distraction-free work-shopping with my team as we build out our capability and maturity. #anxiety is now excitement. I actually did 5 hours of work today in preparation for the coming week, by choice. Its probably been 10+ years since I chose that end of the work/life balance scale on a Sunday.
- peppermint and chamomile #tea keeps the heart, stomach, and mind #calm
- #Cryptonomicon by Neal Stephenson is more enjoyable than #SnowCrash, probably due to the history and non-apocalyptic relatability.
Final day of driving and we're back home to Canada!
I'll be more prolific here after today.
Sorry if I didn't reply for 2 weeks... really stressful, weird week.
Fact: Did you know the US elections of 1800, 1824, 1876, 1948, 1960, & 2000 all produced results that WEREN’T confirmed on #ElectionNight? It’s true!
Today, elections in some countries take a week OR MORE to resolve.
Relax. And remember: #DemocracyWorks.
